God….What A Day.

I guess I should update first–

I went to the dreaded Sept. 25th hearing (representing myself, again), armed with a Crisis worker, two CYS workers, the ER Doctor who signed the 302 order the night of June 2nd-3rd, and one Officer James Collins.  These are the people I subpoena’d.  Also TWO other therapists who have been involved in my care since 2013 wrote letters on my behalf, as well as the Physician’s Assistant that I see regularly at Central Potter Health Center.

Hours passed, and I questioned these people ad nauseam as to the events that transpired on June 2nd, and the following events.

Daniel Lang (Mike Ingalls’ attorney) “let” me call witnesses out of order — he hasn’t presented his entire case against me yet — in order to be nice to them and let them go back to work, because I was clearly ruining their day.  (Ya know–by asking them to vouch for me as a decent and worthy mother and recall events truthfully that will have an impact on THREE children’s lives FOREVER……  what a pain in the ass…….)

I also had the negative results of the drug test I had to submit to a few days before… there’s nothin’ like pissin’ in a cup while somebody’s watchin’ carefully in case you decide to get smart or somethin’……

I do this through the Probation Office now.  (The Probation Office that refused to do my drug testing before when I requested it on the grounds that I am not actually ON Probation.  I also tried Human Services and CYS–who THREATENED me with drug testing, but then when I threw up my hands and said, “PLEASE!!  I WOULD LOVE TO!”, they said it wasn’t in their budget.)

The other THREE negative drug tests that I submitted into evidence that I voluntarily had done in my doctor’s office in an effort to get this ridiculous FOUR MONTH sentence (That is not up until JANUARY 8TH, 2016) reduced while this case was continued and continued and continued “didn’t count.”

Wanna know why?

Nobody WATCHED me piss in that cup.

Maybe I warmed somebody else’s pee up and had it in my purse and poured it into the cup.

Maybe aliens came through the window and peed in the cup instead of me.

MAYBE–maybe the drug dealers that supposedly I sell my “food stamp” money to according to my MOTHER –yup–this is the new one she came up with the other day–manufactured a perfect man-made specimen of chemically correct and pH balanced liquids that look and smell and act like PEE snuck me some of their awesome fake pee juice so that I could get out of drug testing, because I am obviously SUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRR HIGH and DRUNK all the time…….

The case was continued.

I don’t have the new date yet–I’m sure they’ll get it to me in the next month or so–no worries.

In the meantime–


 This has been for the entire summer.  Or less, before the Judge made them [Brenda Bonczar, William Bonczar, Michael Ingalls, and…..bizarrely….Jaimi Hajzus still seems to have her claws in this case, taking a suuuuuuuuuuuuper special interest in it……..oh…did I mention that her boyfriend is my parent’s attorney?  YUP.]

Tonight my mother made sure, like she has done before, to rush the boys into the bathtub when it is time to go, because they cry, and she doesn’t want to have to deal with it.  So she just wants me to disappear to them.  Sometimes Mommy’s here, and then, she just disappears!


Not Okay.

Henry clings to me every second I am near him, won’t even sit in his high chair to eat dinner any more, has to sit on my lap, because he knows.

He knows at any minute, I will be gone again.

For days.

And he won’t be able to see, hear, or touch me at all.

So I go into the bathroom and say, “Jesus, you couldn’t have waited ONE MINUTE so that I could kiss and hug them goodbye??!”

She shrugs and responds, “He wanted to get in.”

Sometimes I am astounded that my body can hold in all of the hatred I have for her.

3 thoughts on “God….What A Day.

  1. I’m on your side I truly am but it sounds to me like so many of your rights and the rights of your children have been violated. Why is there not a child’s advocate who only represents the children and you really need to look into the civil liberties union because your rights have been violated in so many ways and you need to get this in the newspaper or TV or anyway the country can hear about this. There should also be a court appointed mediator at the courts expense. Something just doesn’t seem right and it needs to get right your kids need to be back with you. They can’t just come in and take your kids that’s one right violated because there has to be an investigation before they can take your kids unless they are in imminent danger the courts cannot tell you to stop writing your blog that’s another right violated and they should of by now appointed you an attorney that’s another right violated. This really should be told to anyone who will listen especially the media and civil liberties union.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Mary–belieeeeeeeve me, I have been trying and trying and trying to get ahold of the ACLU and get this–I WAS ACTUALLY ON THE PHONE WITH THE ACLU WHEN IN MY FATHER’S TRUCK TODAY ON THE RIDE FROM MY HOUSE WITH MY BOYS TO MY PARENT’S HOUSE TO SEE LILLY. So, I’m like–OMG, finally! Yes! Maybe there’s hope for HELP in this Hellish Nightmare Situation!!!! As I’m trying to tell her this story, I frantically am giving her the number to my parent’s home landline, because I know my cell phone is going to cut out soon and I know that this is a once in a freaking lifetime opportunity call from Philadelphia from people who are like Angels From Heaven who swoop down and literally save people’s lives–preserving their dignity, their freedom, their right to live–anyway–the phone eventually cuts out, so when we get to the house, I run in and frantically look for the phone. Jaimi’s response is to scream sing-song-ily, “I’M NOT TALKING TO YOU JESSICA!!!” while she runs away from me and slams the door to her apartment/garage. I run upstairs to catch a glimpse of my mother, clutching the phone, stomping up to the third floor to lock herself in her sewing room. This display is ALL IN FRONT OF MY THREE CHILDREN, AGES 5, 1, AND 1, AS WELL AS JAIMI’S 2 YEAR OLD. And these are the people that were chosen over me to care for my children. So you can imagine what happened. It made me sick to see the missed call labeled “ACLU” on the phone with no voicemail attached when she smugly tossed the phone at me a half an hour later and pranced off, gloating with her malignant pleasure at taking another opportunity for help away from me.
      Listen–I’m doing my best here. But if other people don’t start sharing this blog far and wide, and constantly–this will continue. It’s not up to me any more. The power and strength lies in numbers in solidarity. YOU are why I write. YOU can change this. I need your help. I need EVERYBODY’S HELP. THIS MEANS NOTHING IF THE MESSAGES ARE NOT SPREAD. Do you understand? The power is in YOUR hands. I am doing ALL that I can, but I am only one badly beaten, barely standing person at this point…do you see?


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